Once upon a time there was a certain trio of books… and over the course of more time there was a film… and the number fifty stopped meaning half of one hundred, or the age where you throw a big party and smile and all the time you’re thinking, OMG I am older than my mother was when I was a teenager and thought that everyone in my parents’ generation were dinosaurs at best.
Nowadays, Fifty is the new Forty is the new… In a couple of weeks I’ll be celebrating 18 months as a published author; it was the dream of a lifetime (we won’t say ‘Fifty’ here) – but how does the dream compare with reality? That’s complicated, and it’s difficult to judge because there are at least…
Fifty Shades of Being Published…
1. You love it.
2. It terrifies the life out of you.
3. You meet some really great people (and a couple you avoid thereafter).
4. You ‘meet’ literally hundreds of great people (and several you avoid like the plague thereafter).
5. You own a kindle.
6. There are at least three books by your old favourite writers that you can’t wait to read but there are just Not. Enough. Hours. in your day now.
7. You discover dozens of new great writers and despair of ever having enough time to read them all.
8. You learn new words like ‘Algorithm’.
9. After a while you can say them without stuttering.
10. The answer to 90% of questions beginning ‘Where did you…’ is: Twitter.
11. You find yourself going on what your accountant calls ‘business trips’.
12. And you realise that they are actually business trips because you wouldn’t have made them otherwise so although you did meet some family and friends too the trips were, yes – business.
13. In the wake of this you receive promo emails from six different airlines.
14. You learn to smile vaguely and say ‘Fine, thanks’ when people ask how sales are going because you don’t get figures until nine months after the start of the previous half year so you really have no idea how sales are going right this minute.
15. Which doesn’t matter anyway because the income generated from book sales is in no relation whatsoever to the time, blood, sweat, tears and joy you expend creating your books.
16. Not to mention the hard cash you expend promoting them.
17. So you still have a day job, and your students start leaving you messages on your Facebook Page when they can’t come to class.
18. This is very sensible because you see them straightaway.
19. You are amazed at the generosity of the strangers you ‘meet’ on social media.
20. But they soon stop being strangers and you realise that like ‘Fifty’, the word ‘Friend’ has a different meaning now.
21. The words ‘my book’ have taken on a whole new meaning too.
22. A ‘free day’ means that you sit at your computer writing (etcetera etcetera) from
7 a.m. until 10 p.m.
23. A ‘good day’ means that you spend more time on the writing part than on the etceteras.
24. A ‘day off’ is something that last happened a year and a half ago.
25. And after 18 months of carefully preserving your children’s anonymity and privacy on social media, you receive a postcard signed ‘Son number two’.
To be continued.
linda huber 
This is a lovely and strangely poignant post. ‘Being Published’ may not be the nirvana we all imagine it to be, but you’re achieving your dream, and that’s what counts.
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Thanks Julie – and so are you, and I’m sure we’d both do it all again! So it’s worth it 🙂
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Oh, yes! And it’s true even if you are your own publisher! 😀
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Yes! With the possible exception of number 14 – I’m sure self-publishers know their statistics sooner! 🙂
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Hi Linda, really enjoyed reading this and found myself nodding along to so many of those. Very funny post. My debut is out in early June and it’s been funny how I assumed everything would be easy once I’d secured the deal but the insecurities and challenges never go away. But I wouldn’t change it for one minute. Wishing you continued success.
Jessica xx
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That’s the important thing, Jessica – we wouldn’t change it. Holding your book really is like holding your baby 🙂 Any pain involved is instantly forgotten…
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Reblogged this on Anita & Jaye Dawes.
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Thank you – have a great Sunday! xx
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My books are only epubbed, but I have joy from a poem, chosen by a publisher to loos onto the world ia their physical publication, Nice one.
Evelyn
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Thank you Evelyn! 🙂
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What a lovely post! Well done to you and to all of us for going after our dream. It is hard work but so very rewarding 🙂
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Thanks Julie! 🙂 All the best with your new release!
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Thank you, Linda. Looking forward to it and feeling terrified in equal measure!
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Standing by to RT!
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Oh, thank you. That’s really kind of you 🙂
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Oh this is such a brilliant list and one I can totally relate to Linda. I’m pretty much in agreement with all of them but absolutely loved 25!!
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Number 25 was the inspiration for the entire post, Georgia! 🙂
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Best 50-something article on the net! 🙂
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Thank you Charli! It’s lovely – and very consoling – that so many writers share my experiences! 🙂
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So right! I will tweet this.
The best bit about it, IMHO, is that when I sit down to ‘work’ I’m actually doing something I’ve chosen to do, and am not obliged to do.
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Exactly – it doesn’t feel like ‘work’. Which is just as well, when you consider the finances… 🙂
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Hi Linda,
You dropped by my site tonight. We met at the linky party. I did not realize you were an author! I’m impressed. It’s been a pleasure meeting you and thank you once again for the site visit today.
Janice
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Hi Janice! The linky party is such a good idea – we get to see so many different kinds of blog posts. Hope to ‘meet’ you again sometime! 🙂
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Congrats on this milestone and many more to come! Thanks for sharing via #MidLifeLuv 🙂
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Thanks Beth – all the best to you too! 🙂
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#25…Son #2. Now that’s hysterical!!! I’m hoping there’s a vacation somewhere there in the “to be continued.”
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That postcard was the inspiration for the whole article – I still have it! The continuation’s here: https://lindahuber.net/2015/03/07/the-complete-fifty-shades/ Still haven’t hit the vacation part but I’m hoping hard for September…
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There is so much food for thought here. Writing has been my dream my whole life, and now I am blessed to be able to work at it. good luck with running in 2016!
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Thanks, Michelle, and a very happy and successful 2016 to you! Writing was my dream too, and like most things, the reality isn’t the same as the dream… but holding your own books makes it all worthwhile! 🙂
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